Ana
So I'm 16 yrs old almost 17 on January and I'm a disable person..Anyways I'm about to start my sophomore yr & I don't wear ANY makeup.. So when I go back to school I want to look different.. I'm working on lots of things this summer, I'm working on loosing weight (my doctor says that if I loose weight theirs a chance I can walk ), not biting my nails, not being SO shy, and dressing different, (I have the same swag 'style' since elementary school).. I'm gonna tell you something really quick.. My height is 4'3 & because my height, my weight and my disability sometimes I feel ugly.. But I always say that this is NOT an excuse for me to not look pretty.. To be honest I'm HAPPY with my life cuz even that I can't walk doesn't mean that I can't look pretty.. In my life I have to many goals. I want to graduate, I want to go to college then I want to be a doctor... I have SO many goals on my life that I won't give up never...NEVER... Anyways here's my question.. How can I tell my parents that I'm growing up and that I want to look like any girl who's 16 like me? How can I tell them that I wanna start using makeup?...ooooh I have NEVER cut my hair too ( it's very long like to my but bottom ) anyways I have asked my mom if I can cut it and she gets very emotional.. How can I can I tell my parents that I'm growing up and that I'm not the same girl as I was before? They think that if I want to use makeup it's because I want boys look at me.. To be 100% honest of course that I want boys to look at me, but even though I have never had a boyfriend I'm not on that a lot, I want to concentrate on my grades more ( I think having a relationship on my age is TO much drama)... By the way I have a great relationship with my mom & dad ( my mom is like my best friend)... So yeah how can I tell my mom that I want to start using makeup? What do you think of all this?Â
Thank you very much for taking your time to read this and thank you for helping :)Â
Ps: I'm SO sorry for my bad spelling, but I'm still learning EnglishÂ
Thank you.... Thank you very much!! For the compliments and all this stuff... I yes my mom says that very mature for my age ( I have been like this since I was little)... I'm from the US but my first language is Spanish ( I talk spanish ALL the time) so that's why I'm not really good on my spelling ( English is the ONLY class that I'm failing)... Anyways THANK YOU to ALL of you :)
Answer
Hi there, my name is Jessica and Im 23 a qualified makeup artist and own a promotional modeling agency... to be honest with you my mother was similar and she still is my bestfriend Im getting married next year and we just started dress shopping she is freaking out that Im growing up... she wasn't dead against it but my friends would do their makeup so tacky and caked on that my mother was like if you don't do it properly don't wear it at all... my mum isn't qualified in makeup but i have learnt more about it from her that anyone else and she can do hers alto better than a lot of other women i know... Yours is probably just concerned she is a mother she loves you so she worries its their job. if you have never worn makeup try to steer away from BLACK eye liner and mascara... Try browns and softer natural tones unless you have black eyelashes don't use black mascara yet, make sure they are not water proof unless you need it and if you don't need eyeliner maybe avoid it if you are interested in makeup look on YouTube they have awesome tutorials try a more natural approach and if possible i suggest you try and talk to your mother don't follow your friends just because they are wearing makeup and definetly don't copy their makeup if its caked on... makeup is an art. hence the reason we are called makeup artists your face is the canvas its about extenuating your features your young and young is beautiful... less is more unless your a drag queen or lady gaga.. :-) if you learn to do it properly and speak to your mother on an open minded level she will respect you more you already sound extremely mature and Im sure she will understand and discuss her concerns as to why so that you may better understand why she feels that way compromise with her maybe only a sheer natural lipgloss and a soft one slick of mascara and build up slowly for her to get used to the idea my BIGGEST TIP is to even suggest that you find some good tutorials like i mentioned earlier and you could have some mother daughter time doing makeup together even though parents are scared of their children growing up they love to be involved a mother teaches her daughter to do makeup just like a father teaches his son to shave its something that is a great bonding moment for you never be the sheep. and copy the other girls be a leader if you learn to do it properly and teach them you will stand out and have your own identity and they will come to you for tips,
also there are some tips for you if you are still not allowed to wear it wash your face with first thing the morning rinse with Cold water the cold water will help give you a bright refreshed look my fav is vasaline or petroleum jelly works well as a lipgloss its shiny but also moisturizes your lips and you can even use it on your eyelashes instead of mascara not too much but just a little shine is nice pinch your cheeks gently and you have a natural blush never pinch too hard you skin is delicate ... i hope this helps if you have any questions let me know xo
Hi there, my name is Jessica and Im 23 a qualified makeup artist and own a promotional modeling agency... to be honest with you my mother was similar and she still is my bestfriend Im getting married next year and we just started dress shopping she is freaking out that Im growing up... she wasn't dead against it but my friends would do their makeup so tacky and caked on that my mother was like if you don't do it properly don't wear it at all... my mum isn't qualified in makeup but i have learnt more about it from her that anyone else and she can do hers alto better than a lot of other women i know... Yours is probably just concerned she is a mother she loves you so she worries its their job. if you have never worn makeup try to steer away from BLACK eye liner and mascara... Try browns and softer natural tones unless you have black eyelashes don't use black mascara yet, make sure they are not water proof unless you need it and if you don't need eyeliner maybe avoid it if you are interested in makeup look on YouTube they have awesome tutorials try a more natural approach and if possible i suggest you try and talk to your mother don't follow your friends just because they are wearing makeup and definetly don't copy their makeup if its caked on... makeup is an art. hence the reason we are called makeup artists your face is the canvas its about extenuating your features your young and young is beautiful... less is more unless your a drag queen or lady gaga.. :-) if you learn to do it properly and speak to your mother on an open minded level she will respect you more you already sound extremely mature and Im sure she will understand and discuss her concerns as to why so that you may better understand why she feels that way compromise with her maybe only a sheer natural lipgloss and a soft one slick of mascara and build up slowly for her to get used to the idea my BIGGEST TIP is to even suggest that you find some good tutorials like i mentioned earlier and you could have some mother daughter time doing makeup together even though parents are scared of their children growing up they love to be involved a mother teaches her daughter to do makeup just like a father teaches his son to shave its something that is a great bonding moment for you never be the sheep. and copy the other girls be a leader if you learn to do it properly and teach them you will stand out and have your own identity and they will come to you for tips,
also there are some tips for you if you are still not allowed to wear it wash your face with first thing the morning rinse with Cold water the cold water will help give you a bright refreshed look my fav is vasaline or petroleum jelly works well as a lipgloss its shiny but also moisturizes your lips and you can even use it on your eyelashes instead of mascara not too much but just a little shine is nice pinch your cheeks gently and you have a natural blush never pinch too hard you skin is delicate ... i hope this helps if you have any questions let me know xo
Life has no meaning for me. I don't know what to do?
Nevermore
I don't know how to explain it well but I feel... dead. I'm living but I feel like a zombie. Up and moving but not really thinking. I feel stupid. I can't think anymore. I don't know how to talk to anyone anymore. My mind is blank. I just want to sleep for a year.
I am 16. I've been isolated from humans for nearly 5 years? Maybe 6. I don't even think of myself as a human anymore. I don't go to school. I quit it sometime in I think, 6th grade? I don't know I can't remember things anymore. Probably why I'm stupid. Can't even answer 4th grade questions. It hurts too much to think.
I live with my only parent. My dad. We don't talk much. There is no people around me. I have no friends. No family. No, no one. I am alone. I'm always alone. I'm scared of people. The very few times I go out they stare at me... whisper things. No I don't like people very much.
I'm ugly too. The mirror doesn't lie. I spend hours looking at it. I am horrific. Very hideous face. A creature. I look dead. Pale skin and sunken in eyes with black rings around them. Brittle & blue nails. Probably because I don't eat.
Life is horrible. Why did I have to be born into this terrible world? I just want to sleep forever. I have another world in my dreams where everything is much better. I am happy in my world. I'm not alone. People are nice and actually talk to me. I am pretty in my world and have shiny golden hair instead of my straw-like brown. I'm starting to feel like the real reality is in my dreams. When I wake up is my nightmare.
Is life supposed to be like this? Why would you want to live in this horrible world? I wish there was a magical pill to make it all go away. I think I'm going to go to sleep. Go back to my world now. My mind is starting to go blank again and my chest is feeling heavy.
Answer
Life doesnt just give us a meaning and purpose. We have to find it for ourselves. Life is a jouney and we cant expect it to be easy and perfect or there would be no point in it. Everybody faces hardships, some face worse than others. But it is facing these hardships that make us stronger, inspiring people. Just know that wherever you are, whatever your situation, however you feel, there is always someone in a much worse position than you. I mean just look at kids in Syria, theyre faced with having to witness deaths and suffering starvation.Â
Some people find meaning in having a religion. You could explore different beliefs, philosophies and religions and find one that makes most sense to you. By practicing a religion, philosophy or a set of beliefs it gives meaning to life.Â
Others find that trying to be successful in life gives them meaning. You mentioned you dont go to school anymore but I highly recommend you go back into some form of education. You need education to be able to get a decent job. Try to take online tests and watch tutorials on how to do things youre struggling with, this will help you improve your academic skills. Think of something you want to achieve and work towards it. You have a real talent for writing I see, maybe you could do some song writing or write poems or books.Â
Helping people can give you meaning because you improve other peoples lives. It also makes you feel better about yourself. Maybe there is somewhere you could volunteer to help like a care home for the elderly. Or you could also help animals e.g make a bird feeder which will help birds as winter is here.Â
Ugly is a horrible word. All people are beautiful in their own way and beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. I always think people look better natural. But maybe wearing make up would make you feel better about yourself. If you want golden hair then you can dye it. But you look fine the way you are, I know it. And try and sleep more, moisturise, drink water and eat healthy food- this will improve your skin.Â
You seem very depressed, tips to try and help you ~~
Cognitive therapies are quite useful in overcoming depression and there are some cognitive techniques that people can use to self help themselves:Â
⢠Pleasant activity planning - make a list of all the days in the week and schedule something you enjoy for each day of the week e.g. watching your favourite film or reading your favourite book.Â
Another cognitive therapy technique is:Â
⢠Thought diary - whenever you feel sad (or happy) write it down when and why. This can help you to see if your depression is worse at a certain time of day or what the reasons for your sadness are. It can also help you to see what makes you happy. And is a good way to express your emotions.Â
Some people find that having a hobby is good for depression because when youre busy doing something you enjoy, you dont have time to think about sadness. It is like a distraction from sadness. Think about what do you like or are interested in. Art?Cooking? Reading? Writing? Gardening?Â
Meditation can also help, but it takes a little time to make a difference in anxiety or depression because first you need to learn how to do it effectively. There are plenty of YouTube tutorials though. Â
You mentioned you dont talk to your dad much but it is better to talk to someone about your feelings rather than keep them to yourself. If you feel you cant actually talk to him then how about writing a letter to him and placing it somewhere he will find.Â
If you feel lonely, there is help like depression helplines. I cant give you any specific contacts because I dont know which country you live in. But if you type into a search engine depression helplines and include your area then something will come up. Depression helplines can offer you emotional support.
I am not sure if I was of any help but I I hope everything gets better.
Â
Life doesnt just give us a meaning and purpose. We have to find it for ourselves. Life is a jouney and we cant expect it to be easy and perfect or there would be no point in it. Everybody faces hardships, some face worse than others. But it is facing these hardships that make us stronger, inspiring people. Just know that wherever you are, whatever your situation, however you feel, there is always someone in a much worse position than you. I mean just look at kids in Syria, theyre faced with having to witness deaths and suffering starvation.Â
Some people find meaning in having a religion. You could explore different beliefs, philosophies and religions and find one that makes most sense to you. By practicing a religion, philosophy or a set of beliefs it gives meaning to life.Â
Others find that trying to be successful in life gives them meaning. You mentioned you dont go to school anymore but I highly recommend you go back into some form of education. You need education to be able to get a decent job. Try to take online tests and watch tutorials on how to do things youre struggling with, this will help you improve your academic skills. Think of something you want to achieve and work towards it. You have a real talent for writing I see, maybe you could do some song writing or write poems or books.Â
Helping people can give you meaning because you improve other peoples lives. It also makes you feel better about yourself. Maybe there is somewhere you could volunteer to help like a care home for the elderly. Or you could also help animals e.g make a bird feeder which will help birds as winter is here.Â
Ugly is a horrible word. All people are beautiful in their own way and beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. I always think people look better natural. But maybe wearing make up would make you feel better about yourself. If you want golden hair then you can dye it. But you look fine the way you are, I know it. And try and sleep more, moisturise, drink water and eat healthy food- this will improve your skin.Â
You seem very depressed, tips to try and help you ~~
Cognitive therapies are quite useful in overcoming depression and there are some cognitive techniques that people can use to self help themselves:Â
⢠Pleasant activity planning - make a list of all the days in the week and schedule something you enjoy for each day of the week e.g. watching your favourite film or reading your favourite book.Â
Another cognitive therapy technique is:Â
⢠Thought diary - whenever you feel sad (or happy) write it down when and why. This can help you to see if your depression is worse at a certain time of day or what the reasons for your sadness are. It can also help you to see what makes you happy. And is a good way to express your emotions.Â
Some people find that having a hobby is good for depression because when youre busy doing something you enjoy, you dont have time to think about sadness. It is like a distraction from sadness. Think about what do you like or are interested in. Art?Cooking? Reading? Writing? Gardening?Â
Meditation can also help, but it takes a little time to make a difference in anxiety or depression because first you need to learn how to do it effectively. There are plenty of YouTube tutorials though. Â
You mentioned you dont talk to your dad much but it is better to talk to someone about your feelings rather than keep them to yourself. If you feel you cant actually talk to him then how about writing a letter to him and placing it somewhere he will find.Â
If you feel lonely, there is help like depression helplines. I cant give you any specific contacts because I dont know which country you live in. But if you type into a search engine depression helplines and include your area then something will come up. Depression helplines can offer you emotional support.
I am not sure if I was of any help but I I hope everything gets better.
Â
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